With a little help from my friendsPosted: November 10, 2011
Well it turns out Arielle and I are not the only college seniors wringing our hands about the future.
Recently a number of friends have been talking and writing about life after graduation, and wouldn’t you know it, their thoughts are pretty insightful!
Eli Epstein’s anxieties pretty much run the gamut, from online dating to employment to workplace monotony. He wrote about it in the Washington Square News (link isn’t up yet), and sent us a copy:
At this point I don’t want to enter those dark, murky doors of The Real World, and even if I grudgingly slide in, I wont know what to do once I’m there. I liken it to the great scene from “Heat” (Robert DeNiro and Al Pacino’s only time on screen together before they made some lousy movie a few years ago) where Detective Vincent Hanna (Pacino) and bank robber Neil McCauley (DeNiro) reluctantly, and quite tragically, admit to each other that they just don’t know how to do anything else, nor do they much want to. Neil’s going to continue to take scores; Vincent’s going to continue to track down guys like Neil. Come May, I wont know how to do much else besides be a kid, nor will I much want to. I’m scared folks.
Cynthia Stewart told me that the present only lasts four seconds, and that we should only focus on what we can do now to influence the course of our lives. She also managed to mention Spongebob.
In conclusion, the reason our past cannot help our future anymore is because we are not growing up, we are starting over. We’ve been old kids for a very long time, but now we are baby adults. Still, the future is less stressful if we realize we are already accomplishing it, (i.e. my “future is now” point).
You gave advice in your blog for what to do when you’re freaking out about the future. I recommend the song “Living in the Sunlight Loving in the Moonlight” by Tiny Tim (if you don’t know it you’ll remember it from Spongebob). I may seem carefree at times and be a yang compared to your yin-ness, but I’m just distracting myself from the same anxiety about the future.
Nicole Robert wrote on her blog about transitioning from childhood to adulthood, covering everything from an encounter at a gas station to her dad’s cross country adventures. Her message was pretty positive, actually, and ended on this hopeful note:
I was explaining to my Dad that I can’t just make something of myself when I’m working under people who are more important than me. And he said “Honey, you are an adult now. Don’t let people treat you like a child just because you are younger than them. You can be friends with someone who is 45 or 50 or 60 years old”.
And he’s 100% right. I shouldn’t let people treat me like a child. I shouldn’t wait for orders. I shouldn’t have to ask permission. I should just go out and fight and GET what I want. And I shouldn’t let people who are older than me get in the way. I shouldn’t be intimidated by them. Because hell, I could be more intelligent than them, but I’ll never know unless I take a shot at getting what I want.